The Liver Mush Wager
Mary Byrnes (assistant professor, Sociology) and Nate Kreuter (assistant professor, English),
Western Carolina University, Cullowhee, North Carolina
Be it known that the undersigned (Mary Byrnes and Nate Kreuter) have agreed that liver mush is the most disgusting food product imaginable, and have placed the offensive frozen pork product at the center of a similarly agreed-upon wager. Mary Byrnes and Nate Kreuter have wagered to each write five (5) scholarly articles during the 2010-2011 academic year.
For the purposes of this wager, the academic year has been defined as the period of time between the start of classes in the fall semester of 2010 at Western Carolina University and the beginning of Memorial Day Weekend in May, 2011.
For the purposes of the wager a scholarly article has been defined as an article in each individual’s respective field of study that is intended for peer review and subsequent publication in an academic journal. The five (5) articles that each of the signatories of the wager must write do not need to be in print or even under review, but only in a state of final completion such that each article is ready to be “placed in an envelope” and sent to an academic journal for immediate peer review.
Liver Mush, foul thing that it is, requires no definition beyond its presence and labeling as “liver mush” in the frozen foods sections of local grocery stores in the Western North Carolina geographic region.
Should both signatories complete their five (5) articles, the wager shall be considered a “push” and neither party shall suffer any penalty.
Should either signatory fail to complete their five (5) articles, they shall have to eat a meal of liver mush prepared by the other signatory, in front of witnesses, preferably at Western Carolina University’s U-Club. The signatory preparing the liver mush may prepare it in any way that they choose, no matter how foul, with the only stipulation that the liver mush shall be thoroughly cooked (for reasons of food safety). Should both signatories fail to fulfill the obligations of the wager, both shall suffer this, The Liver Mush Penalty.
Both signatories shall provide copies of their completed articles to the other upon request and without delay in order to verify compliance with the terms of the wager. No welshing.
A signed and witnessed copy of this wager agreement will be held by each party to the wager. Additionally, a signed and witnessed copy of the wager shall be deposited in the University Club (i.e., U-Club) of Western Carolina University. The terms of the wager may be altered only under conditions of extreme duress and with the mutual agreement of both signatories.
signed, Mary Byrnes
signed, Nate Kreuter